As was reported in CNBC’s latest American Greed Report, a new twist in online dating scams involves con artists exploiting Americans’ respect for the military.
One woman thought she met a military officer named Adam Smith who was serving overseas, and had a young daughter.
When he asked her to send him money to support his daughter, she did. She believed she had found love through the online dating site, and that her support was simply her contribution to the relationship.
Only after she wired him nearly $23,000 over multiple transactions did she realize it was all a scam.
An alert made earlier this year by the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center stated that “The criminals who carry out romance scams are experts at what they do. They spend hours honing their skills and sometimes keep journals on their victims to better understand how to manipulate and exploit them.”
In other words, these online con artists are experts at portraying themselves as someone they are not; they are perfectionists at convincing their victims that they are real people who “also” found love through online dating.
Now, let’s say you’ve already determined that your online match isn’t a catfish. You still might wonder: is he or she a genuine person?
Genuineness is one characteristic that is arguably one of the most desirable in any relationship.
You want to know that when someone says he or she has your best interests at heart, it’s the truth.
You want to know whether you could describe this person as a real, authentic, genuine person.
So, let’s look at some of the traits genuine people tend to share:
They’re Content With Who They Are
Genuine people tend to be secure with themselves. They don’t have the desire to impress others. They’re probably not chasing social media stardom or taking compliments without giving them.
Genuine people aren’t usually afraid to speak their minds. They’re okay if you disagree with their opinions because they’re content with themselves. They also don’t have a need to convince others that their opinions are right.
They Can Admit Their Faults & Mistakes
Without insecurity holding them back, genuine people take responsibility for when they mess up. They can admit when they’re wrong. They can tell you the things they aren’t good at.
They’re Not Judgmental
Because genuine people can admit their own shortcomings, they see the complexities of humans and are more accepting of others. Honest interactions happen when preconceived notions aren’t a factor: something genuine people are good at doing.
They Do What They Say
Genuine people tend to be consistent. If they say they’ll do something, they’ll do it. They practice what they preach.
When it comes to “in real life” dates with your online match, your instinct will help guide you through detecting these traits. Just keep in mind that time is another factor. We recounted a story of how one woman’s life was turned upside-down overnight by letting a stranger into her life too easily.
Time, and knowing what to look for, will help you determine if this person is the real deal.